When we see someone for the first time, we ask, "What do you do for a living, where are you from, are you married, do you have children?" Based on their responses to those and other, admittedly surface-level questions, we invariably form opinions about them. We may draw conclusions about their political views and anticipate how they will respond to various scenarios.
I have been an associate at Baker Donelson for a year, and it has been a whirlwind of meeting new people from many offices, backgrounds, faiths, and political views. One person I have had the pleasure to meet and develop a friendship with is Vinnie Nelan. My interactions with Vinnie have reinforced the old adage that you cannot judge a book by its cover. I have learned that, even in our perceived differences, we all have common ground. Vinnie is an Irish American Catholic who grew up in the Bronx and Palm Beach County, Florida. I am an African American Methodist preacher's kid from Birmingham, Alabama. Vinnie has two lovely children and a wife, Valerie Nelan. I'm currently unmarried with no children. Vinnie is a Gen Xer. I'm a Millennial. Please enjoy the following conversation.
How we found common ground in our perceived differences.
Throughout this exercise, Vinnie and I learned that while we share many differences, we also have plenty of common ground. Vinnie's formative years were spent in Florida, while I lived my entire life in Alabama. He was sent to New York by his parents in the hope he would receive a great education where he could learn in a safe environment. That was not a concern for my parents, because I was raised in a small town where everyone knew one another. Vinnie was raised in an era where cell phones were futuristic devices seen only on The Jetsons. While we grew up in two totally different eras with unique challenges, we both became first-generation college graduates, and ultimately the first attorneys in our families. We recognize that everyone has differences, but when we take the time to get to know one another, we all have things in common that can be a catalyst to building a strong team and friendship.