Many are familiar with the term parental alienation. However, many are entirely unfamiliar with the term realistic estrangement.

Parental alienation is where one parent begins a campaign to demean and defame the other parent to the children. In these instances, the parent is generally acceptable. However, due to the continued efforts to undermine that parent, the children often do not want to see the parent who is the victim of parental alienation.

Parental alienation typically has to occur over a long period for it to be successful. However, it can damage a parent’s relationship with their children once it takes hold.

What Is Realistic Estrangement?

Realistic estrangement is the opposite of parental alienation. When realistic estrangement exists, the children generally do not want to see that parent. Yet, it is not because the other parent has been campaigning to demean and defame the other parent to the children.

Instead, the parent’s behavior has been so outrageous around the children that the children do not want to see that parent for justified reasons. It could be that the parent has been abusive physically or emotionally to the children.

In these instances, the parent is not simply making mistakes here and there. The parent’s behavior is repeated and continually outrageous over a long period.

Many courts have difficulty deciphering whether realistic estrangement or parental alienation exists in certain circumstances. A guardian ad litem almost always has to investigate the situation. In some situations, a custody evaluation by a psychologist is necessary.

What To Do When Their Realistic Estrangement?

It can be complicated in child custody matters where there is realistic estrangement. In many cases, the parent’s visits may need to be supervised temporarily or permanently.

Parents who have estranged themselves from their children often need parenting classes and counseling to improve their behavior around the children. However, when parents do not take ownership of their inappropriate behavior, they frequently do not attend parenting classes and counseling.

The children often need counseling in situations where they have suffered physical and emotional abuse from an abusive parent. Sometimes, the situation can improve, and the children want to see their parents again. Sadly, in other cases, that is not the case.

Courts are often put in a challenging position where realistic estrangement exists for these reasons. It is usually not as simple as making the children go with the other parent. If the court forces it, kids can sometimes run away or engage in self-harm, substance abuse, or other problems.